Bearton Abbey is the home of siblings, Steerforth and Georgiana Beartram. Share in their daily escapades along with cousins, Burl and Pearl Cavedish of Cavedweller Hall, and friends who have yet to be revealed. Hobbs the butler always has something interesting to add making Barton a welcome and happy place indeed.

Wednesday, July 29, 2015

Growl and Bear It!!! A humorous look at life:). The first installment.


The thoughts and opinions expressed by Mr. Buzzfuzz in no way reflect upon or represent those of the person typing this column. Mr. Buzzfuzz exercises his right as a mohair teddy bear to be grumpy, crotchety, cranky, irritable, and cantankerous as written in the Bear of Rights. Having studied at Bearkley University as well as Bear Cave U, he is well versed in the ethics and regular violation of said ideals as viewed on a daily basis. For those who do not have a sense of humor, are unable to laugh at themselves, or are easily offended, Mr. Buzzfuzz suggests that you ‘talk to the paw.’

Recent Cheating Scandals

Good evening and thank you for taking the time from your busy schedule to visit. I am Mr. Buzzfuzz, a Bearrister of strong opinion, with a few thoughts regarding the recent NFL scandals. It is a disturbing thought that a cheating scandal in the NFL highlights the headlines when serious things are happening around the world. Furthermore, my muzzle quivers at the idea that a team caught cheating was permitted to play, and subsequently win, a national title, all the while having achieved this feat through deception!!! What kind of message does this send to Americans? But I digress. Let us look at cheating from a different perspective. Recently a group of teachers, whose jobs were on the line if they didn’t produce test scores at a level statistically impossible, chose to cheat. I’m not condoning their actions but one can understand how the pressure and unrealistic expectations placed upon them led to this course of action. For those who are Winnie the pooh-poohing this idea, you obviously have never been in a classroom where teachers are responsible for instructing 20 plus children, some of which are defiant with serious behavioral issues (chair throwing, attacking adults and students, using scissors and pencils as weaponry) while others have notable learning problems. Let us not forget the children who are poverty stricken, hungry, or living in abusive, neglectful homes. Yup, teachers have to teach ALL of these kids. Despite these challenges, every child is expected to be at or above grade level on test scores.  Once again, statistically impossible! A group of teachers caved to the pressure and cheated, a very bad decision indeed. Not only did they lose their jobs, but they lost their licenses to teach. Additionally they had to pay fines!!! But wait, there’s more! They also have to go to prison!!! Does this seem like equity and fairness in punishment? Let’s investigate further, shall we? Big important quarterback cheats in order to win millions of dollars and complains because he’s not allowed to play for four games next season. Oh the horror! He won the millions of dollars by cheating and did not have to forfeit his title or cash prize. Another football player decks his fiancée and has to attend anger management class and pay the huge fine of…wait for it…$125.00. That’s right, $125, a crippling amount for someone who makes millions of dollars each year. Another NFL player was allowed to return to his job with a different team after serving in prison for abusing animals. Outrageous! These are the role models for America’s youth! The message sent is quite clear; if you play professional sports you are above the law. You can cheat, as well as physically abuse animals and people whenever you choose because you are important. But teachers? If they cheat (notice that abuse and physical aggression are missing from the list of transgressions) not only are they reprimanded but denied access to their career FOREVER, pay fines beyond their salaries, and serve in prison. I can hardly bear it! The final lesson; don’t cheat (unless you are a pro athlete) and it is acceptable to beat women and children and abuse animals (once again, only if you are a pro athlete). Enough said. Don’t agree with me? Talk to the paw.

Tuesday, March 17, 2015

Happy St. Patrick's Day from Sweetbrier Spa and Resort!

Brumby bear looking spiffy in his St. Patty's day attire.

Mr. Buzzfuzz, something of a cynical bearrister.

Happy St. Patrick's Day from the spa!!!

Brumby bear's spa day continues...

Before his facial and mani/pedi...

and after.

A little teddy bear yoga to exercise the limbs.

Relaxing on the porch after a long day:).

Saturday, March 14, 2015

Harley Persists

“Harley! I am quite serious! I’ve no time for your nonsense! Leave now!”

“Hobbs, old chap, don’t get your mohair in a fluff. I’ve done nothing seriously wrong, to speak of, and I must say I am hurt at the inference that I’ve only come to escape some unpleasant situation. Besides, you’ve nothing to fear. I’ll not embarrass you or reveal anything to compromise your situation here.”

“That is the most truthful statement I've heard. You will not compromise anything here because you are leaving, NOW!”

The rattling of carriage wheels coming up the drive alerted Hobbs of the  Bearton’s arrival. Realizing he hadn’t time to deal with his brother he acquiesced.
“Very well Harley, go downstairs and we will chat over a pot of tea.”

“I knew you’d come round ole brother bear of mine. By the way, where do you keep the honey?”

“NO HONEY! Just wait downstairs and I’ll be there shortly.”

“Fine, no need to get huffy.”

Harley started for the back stairs when he heard Hobbs open the front door, greeting the Beartons.
Peeking from the hallway, Harley beheld the most beautiful creature he had ever seen. 

Her shimmering white fur and sparkling eyes infiltrated his very soul.

“Miss Georgianna, Mr. Steerforth, welcome home. I hope the ball was a great success.”

“Indeed it was Hobbs, thank you. It’s a bit chilly outside so a pot of tea would be nice, please.”

“Of course, sir.”
Hobbs hurried from the room to the kitchen downstairs; however, when he entered it was empty. His fur bristled and his heart palpitated within his chest.

“Where on earth did that blasted bear go now?” he mumbled to himself.

Wednesday, March 11, 2015

Please Welcome Brumby Bear!!!

Brumby Bear arrived today via manilla envelope by way of commercial post.

After a grueling excursion he arrived at the Sweetbriar Resort and Spa where he will reside for a few weeks. Here he is in the spa's Jungle Room waiting for a cocktail, a Beary Daiquiri:).

Brumby chatting with new acquaintances while waiting for his intake consultation.

Relaxing, he awaits word of his schedule for the next few weeks. The first order of business is a Woolite aroma therapy cleansing exfoliation treatment followed by a fluff and dry. His eye replacement therapy will begin in the near future once a set of buttons is selected that suits his personality and fur color.

Stay tuned for more on Brumby's spa stay and upcoming adventures...

Thursday, March 5, 2015

The Bear; When Mothers and Daughters Shop...

As you will soon discover, my mother and I are a dangerous pair when it comes to teddy bears (and antique photos, books, tea, stuffed animals, wine...well, you get the idea:). As I surfed ebay this evening I stumbled across this poor little bear. With only a few minutes left in the auction, he was bid-less. I phoned my mother (not a good idea as we get into trouble when shopping, especially when our heartstrings are tugged by an eyeless, worn, and beloved teddy bear) and told her to check him out. Before you knew it we were bidding on the little guy and counting down the seconds (yes, over the phone) until the auction closed and he was ours. So, in approximately a week or so (it may be longer as he is traveling from the icy tundra formerly known as Wisconsin) he will arrive at his new abode. His ongoing adventures will be posted on this bloodspot as well as FB.  Until we meet him face to snout he will be referred to as 'the bear.'

Friday, February 27, 2015

50 Shades of Mohair; A 'Bearody' (get it? instead of a parody it's a bearody?)

50 Shades of Mohair (with a touch of cat hair:).
Silvery gray, pearlescent white, coffee brown, tawny tan, dusky black…ahh, the enticing shades of teddy bear mohair. In the dusty corner of attics to the deep recesses of ambrosial scented cedar chests reside the tantalizingly cuddly cohorts of childhood. With the seductive allure of glassy eyes, soft embroidered lips, and moveable limbs, the teddy bear is childhood’s hero, guarding little ones from the ever present dangers lurking beneath beds or within the darkness of closets. These cuddly companions provide comfort, friendship, and unmitigated devotion. A dedicated lot, they endure a mélange of frivolity such as the provocative enticement of tea parties, late night sleepovers, not to mention dressing up in all manner of costuming engaging in make-believe play. Their cottony memories safeguard childhood secrets and confessions while woolly mohair is bathed in the salty tears of disenchantment.
What begins as a soft furry playmate slowly morphs into a ragged companion enduring loss of stuffing, mending, petting, and snuggling. Fur fades, mohair wears, and glass eyes are lost, yet these treasured comrades persist, evoking a sense of contentment and gratification lasting a lifetime. Surrender to the repressed yearning of childhood merriment by indulging in a night of peace and tranquility found in the cuddly companionship of a mohair teddy bear.